Oscar Wilde said, “To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all.” When I was diagnosed with Stage IV Metastatic Breast Cancer, I woke up. I had been existing, but had I been living? Retirement suddenly seemed out of reach. I envisioned existence on earth to be much shorter than I had always anticipated. I contemplated whether I would live to see another Christmas, birthday, or grandchild enter the world.
That was December 2016, and I’m still here! We have since had three Christmases, Easters, birthdays, and added two more grandchildren to the Nana and Yoda clan. You know if you follow my story, my body is stable and the treatment is working. I am blessed, and I am grateful.
After the initial shock dissipated and we had a treatment plan in place, my husband and I set a goal: to live. Enjoy the company of the ones we love, stop to smell the roses, smell the rain, study the Bible, play, travel, activate the brain, help someone, relax, listen for God’s voice, have a deep conversation, learn something, laugh, dream of the next big adventure, prepare for the future, take care of my body, attend a support group, savor food, share life.
Cancer may have altered my existence, but it cannot take away my life.
I admit it is tiring at times. I move slower than I used to. Sometimes my body hurts. My mind is not as sharp as it once was. Occasionally I take a nap or put up my feet. Caring friends often tell me I am too busy. I should slow down. And sometimes I do.
Yet, even in the slowing down, I choose to live. We do not want to merely exist, trudging from sunup to sundown, grinding the same routine. Determined, we live life filled to capacity and overflowing.
What about you? Do you merely exist, or do you live?
Á la prochaine…until next time.
“A thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I have come so they may have life. I want them to have it in the fullest possible way.” ~Jesus (John 10:10, NIRV)