As a breast cancer survivor, my goal is to help other women who have been newly diagnosed to experience hope as they go through the journey. It is my faith in God that kept me going. As a licensed marriage and family therapist, it is also my privilege to help families who are affected by this horrible disease. My husband of almost 40 years and I have two grown children who are married, and seven grandchildren.
Today consists of another visit with my wonderful oncologist, along with blood work and chemotherapy. It’s the first time Tim has been to the doctor with me in quite a while. Maybe two years? First, he stopped coming due to Covid, then it became more of a habit, and too convenient to drop me off (or he was out of town). Finally, MD Anderson opened up and started allowing one person to accompany patients. They even took away their plastic shields.
This was also my first visit since my scans back in February. I wasn’t concerned. Well, maybe a little. But, if there was an issue he would have called me. The dude never sleeps. No news is typically good news, especially with such a great doctor. He continues to tell me how well I am responding to the treatment, and he is pleased with my progress.
All my scans look good. You don’t have to read any further to know my body is still stable. Having said that…
They always see evidence of cancer in my bones. Likely it is where the cancer was and not is. Cancer eats away the bone, and therefore my bones are always a concern. Bone density shows I have osteopenia (which I have had for several years). He is referring me to a bone specialist downtown just to make sure we aren’t missing anything. (Add another specialist to the list!) He doesn’t think it will change any of the treatment, but this is their speciality so…It might impact how often, or if, I get the Zometa.
The CT scan did find a new spot in the space between my lung and lining of the lung. It is less than 5 mm. The tip of a pencil is about 2-3 mm, so that tells you how small it is. If I wasn’t getting scanned all the time, we would likely not even know this exists. There is nothing to do with it, except watch it to see if it grows. It could be anything. Left over from an infection. Cancer. Benign something or other. Who knows? It’s too small to biopsy, and even if it was negative this would not change anything. The radiologist impression basically says to watch it.
We had a lengthy and entertaining discussion about Covid, Dr. Fauci, the CDC, wearing masks, and other life events. Of course we also talked about my treatment, and when to know if someone is “cured” from metastatic disease, etc. And we pondered whether to stop treatment, or if I am even a candidate to *ever* stop treatment.
Researchers will likely never know how long we should be on Arimadex, Herceptin and Perjeta. The reason for this is multi-faceted. Our population is small. Also, due to the complexity of the disease there is an inability to do effective research. Would you be willing to participate in a randomized sample, where you may be in the group who stops treatment, just to see if your disease progresses?
Um…no thank you! So, the research will never be done. Who would participate in a study like that? We will likely never know if, or when, we can stop treatment.
Bottom line. I will never be considered “cured” because there is always going to be evidence of disease in my system. (I suppose the Lord could completely heal my bones and evidence would disappear. But I will accept whatever He does.)
We concluded I will never stop treatment, because even if I don’t have disease showing up in my system the treatment is keeping it asleep.
He did remind us to live life. Don’t worry about missing a dose if we go on a lengthy vacation, etc. Don’t do it on a regular basis, but don’t let treatment prevent you from visiting places like Australia. If they ever open up enough for us to get in.
Oops! I need to go put on my Lidocaine cream. Almost time for treatment!
It seems like I keep repeating myself. Scan, rinse, repeat. Every…six…months. Another half-day of scans and a doctor visit. It may sound a bit redundant after a while.
However, there is an upside to today’s story. They didn’t do contrast (so no IVs or pokes) and they included a scan of my carotid arteries as well. It’s the first time I’ve had this one. Due to family history, my cardiologist ordered this test along with the echocardiogram. Note: The echocardiogram is not the same as an EKG. This involves a 30 minute ultrasound of the heart and nearby arteries. Breathe in, hold your breath, breathe. Breathe out, hold your breath, breathe normally. It sounds more relaxing than reality when they are jabbing your ribs with the goop and a wand.
I’m happy to say my echo looks good. Yes, that is a bit of an echo (insert rimshot) which I’m pleased to report. Treatment can continue.
The carotid scan is also an ultrasound, looking at both arteries on the left and right sides. The right side looks good. The scan detected some plaque on the left side, but it looks small enough not to worry about. That’s what the tech said, as he showed it to me on the screen. It looks like less than 50%. I’ll know more when the doctor gets the results, but it doesn’t seem to be cause for concern.
I am comforted by the care they give me at MD Anderson. I know the Lord put me here at just such a time as this. I’m also happy to be in our RV on the day I had to be downtown for all these appointments. Thirty minutes to the downtown medical center is not nearly as bad as driving from Conroe. Yay! Another upside.
On another note, I saw the colorectal surgeon at MD Anderson for a consult last Friday, and she concurred with the external surgeon’s opinion. They both agree I should get a colonoscopy with a specialist, to remove the polyp, and only do surgery if it is required at that point. They have specialists at MD Anderson who do this, who are not surgeons.
While private practitioners shouldn’t do surgery if it is not necessary, they can do it if they think it is necessary. Tim noted they get paid more money to do surgery versus a colonoscopy so there’s that 🤷♀️. Just saying…
MD Anderson doctors are paid on salary, so they don’t have a need to justify surgery unless, well, it’s justified. They have specialists at MD Anderson who are trained to dig deep enough to get out large polyps, but they are not surgeons, so they would not do surgery while I’m incapacitated. I wouldn’t really want to wake up thinking I had a polyp removed and discover nearly half my colon was also missing 😳. Although it could be a good weight loss plan 🤷♀️. Hmmm 🤔.
At any rate, I will go back downtown for another consult with the specialist, and then most likely go in for the procedure (colonoscopy) to remove the polyp. That sounds much better than losing 40% of my colon. I’m hoping and praying that is sufficient. Stay tuned on that one as well.
Medical stuff is a constant waiting game! First this scan or this doctor, then the next. Wait for results (still waiting on CT and bone scan as well as today’s carotid). Wait for the consult. Wait for the procedure. Wait, wait, wait. (Do I hear another echo?)
What does the Bible have to say about this? For one, worrying won’t make us live longer (Matt. 6:27). And Paul tells us not to worry, but to cast our cares on the Lord (Phil. 4:6). Also, you may remember the story when King Saul jumped in too quickly and failed to wait for Samuel to offer a sacrifice, so he missed out on the blessing of a forever kingdom (I Samuel 13:8-14).
I don’t want to miss out on a blessing. Maybe by waiting I’ll keep my entire colon intact. Maybe I’ll meet someone along the way who needs a word of encouragement. Whatever it is, I’m going to give it to the Lord and wait… patiently. Perhaps in the waiting, I will not miss out on a blessing.
Will you wait patiently for the Lord and look for your blessing?
“That was stupid!” Samuel said. “You didn’t obey the Lord your God. If you had obeyed him, someone from your family would always have been king of Israel. But no, you disobeyed, and so the Lord won’t choose anyone else from your family to be king. In fact, he has already chosen the one he wants to be the next leader of his people.”
Sometimes Tim and I visit model homes to get decorating ideas. That’s what we did on this beautiful Sunday afternoon while we were waiting for our granddaughter’s party to start. But, wait, this is titled “The Four Boys,” so it has nothing to do with our beautiful granddaughter who just turned seven, or the Urban Air experience, or the yummy chocolate cake, or watching children float down the zip line and run through the mazes.
Four young teenage boys from different cultural backgrounds were friends. They were wandering the street when we pulled up to the first house on model row. One was riding a bike; another was carrying a plastic baseball bat; and they were having some fun interacting with the model hosts as well as guests. We were the only guests at the moment.
They told us we would have to pay an entrance fee. They informed us we would need a million dollars to buy that house. They told us not to go inside because they were asked to leave. They were harmless, really, just hanging out and having some fun. But boys will be boys, and the agents were concerned they might accidentally break something.
After some friendly banter, off they went, and we went inside the first house.
I didn’t think more about it until we were walking down the path to the second and third house. The boys turned back around and began interacting with us. They seemed willing and even eager to engage us in conversation, so I turned back to greet them before following Tim into the model home.
I immediately picked out who was who, and decided to have some fun with them as well. Mr. Knuckles reached out his hand to shake mine, then winced as we shook hands; he showed me the sores on his knuckles. As it turns out, he was trying to adopt me as his mom so he could get inside the house. I nearly had to pry him away.
Before I went in, I felt the urge to talk with them more. I asked the boys, “You say these houses are expensive, right?”
Yeah…they all nodded their heads in agreement.
“You need at least a half-million dollars to own one, right?”
More nods. More playful hits on their friends’ arms and chest.
“Okay, so I’m going to give you a little lesson on your future. One day you’ll look back on this day and remember the crazy lady that stood in front of the model home, and you’ll thank me for this.” They got a laugh out of that, but they stuck around for more.
“I’m going to ask you a question, and I want you to think about it seriously.”
Intrigue seemed to increase.
“Look at this house. Look at it closely. What do you need to do…right now…and in the future…to buy one of these homes?” I asked.
They came up with several answers. Mr. Afro said, “play in the NFL” and “be an entrepreneur,” as Mr. Cheeseball wearing the AC/DC shirt came up with anything from selling drugs to being a porn star. He didn’t get the reaction he was seeking from me. Mr. Knuckles kept begging to be my adopted kid.
Mr. Intuitive on the bike seemed most interested as well as sincere when he said, “Save money. Get a job. Go to college.”
“Great ideas!” I said. You’re going to go places. I thought.
This conversation continued as I challenged the boys to start thinking about their future now. Today. What do they need to do to go to college (get good grades), and what if the NFL doesn’t call (if they do, you can buy a house for all your friends). Or what if that drug deal goes south. You need a better plan.
Mr. Intuitive seemed to listen the most intently, but I think the others maybe heard as well. I challenged him to think about that, to plan for his future, and to remember this conversation.
Take your future seriously. Keep a mental picture of this house, and what you need to do to buy one some day. Be smart. Don’t wait until you’re thirty and wonder what you are going to do with your life.
I said a few more things to encourage them, and then I went inside the model wondering if that conversation had an impact. Sometimes it takes just one person to leave a mark.
I know they left a soft spot in me. I truly wondered if those kids will grow up and make something of their lives. They are just hanging out, enjoying life on a Sunday afternoon. They have no idea what lies ahead of them. Will they take life for granted, or take it by the horns?
It is for moments like these that I believe I am still alive today.
As we were exiting the home, the boys were still out there. We had a few more exchanges, then Mr. Afro told me his name so I could remember him when he’s a famous NFL player. I think he was listening.
Mr. Intuitive said he would remember our talk. I looked him square in the eyes and told him he had some potential. I can see it in him. He is going to do something great with his life.
He’s already looking for ways to make money. He tried to guess my age for $20. He missed by four years.
My daughter introduced me to Dr. Who years ago. We watched the whole series. The knowledge has come in handy from time to time, as I now know what a Tardis is, amongst other things. It was hard to imagine Dr. Who as Queen Elizabeth’s husband in “The Crown” series, but there he was! I kept imagining he would find a red phone booth somewhere in London and poof!
Sometimes I wish I could be transported into the future when technology can eliminate the need for doctors. But for now, it’s the life I live. One specialist after another. I’ve kind of lost count, but I have many doctors following me, and they all have their niche reasons. It’s a full-time job being my own personal assistant. Fortunately, I have a calendar to keep me straight. Most of the time.
Dr. You is a colorectal surgeon at MD Anderson. She comes to The Woodlands once or twice a week, so I agreed to see her. My oncologist referred me to her when I told him about the polyp in my colon. I liked Dr. Knapp (see previous post), but it doesn’t hurt to have a second opinion.
As it turns out, MD Anderson has a team of specialists who can remove challenging polyps laparoscopically. This can help me to avoid surgical removal of part of my colon. That’s the hope anyway! Dr. You referred me to Dr. Gee. (It’s not pronounced “Jee” like I thought. The G is hard as in “goose.”) Anyway, he will perform a special procedure to get the polyp out of there.
It’s scheduled for Wednesday, April 27th. Downtown. Fortunately we will already be downtown so I won’t have to fight quite as much traffic. There’s a bit more prep than a regular colonoscopy, including a Covid test the previous day, followed up by a week-long liquid diet ramped up to normal.
The upside is, I might lose some weight in the process. One can hope! I’ll keep you posted on the outcome.
It’s 1:28 PM and the day is only half over. The morning started with a drive through traffic to MD Anderson in The Woodlands for my 8:00 AM bloodwork. Third Floor.
Then I was off to getting prepped for CT scans of the chest, abdomen, pelvis and whole body bone scan (access port, drink the peach tea contrast, inject the nuclear tracer). First Floor.
A few abnormalities happened to me today, but since I’m used to the process I didn’t panic. A little trouble with blood return. Raise your hand. Make a fist. Lay back. Cough… That did take care of it. In addition, they had too many nuclear medicine tracers in my room. Three to be exact. Fortunately, I had a savvy nurse who quickly figured out which one is mine. Is it a full moon? 🙄🙄
The CT tech took me back a little early, so that cleared up some time between scans to go and eat the oatmeal I had brought with me. I also bought some tea in their café. Second Floor.
I’m pretty good at math, but when the bone scan tech said today was a slow day with about 120 patients, I was quite surprised. They normally have between 150-160 patients every day 😳.) I couldn’t wrap my head around it. They only have the one machine. Mine takes about 15-20 minutes. How do they fit them all in? It’s one of those mysteries I may never know the answer to.
After some humorous comments by the bone scan tech about various people snoring over the loud speaker, I’m pretty sure I fell asleep 🥱. He concurred, but he said he didn’t have any recording to prove it. Whew 😅. First Floor.
I normally do these scans about every four to six months. My oncologist brought me in at the three month mark this time due to some pain in my right ribcage. It comes and goes. It is reminiscent of when and where the cancer started in my left ribcage, so he’s scanning a bit earlier than normal to be certain. I suspect all will be clear, but you never know with this disease.
That took us until noon. We should get the results in the next few days.
They left my port accessed for chemo (immunotherapy). Tim picked me up for lunch, and we left the building. We also got to pop into Circle K and say hello to Elizabeth. It was nice to see her in the middle of the day. She looks tired, but I think she is doing okay. I’m really proud of her for working so hard to keep her family afloat.
I came back early for chemo, with hopes of getting in and out a bit early. I just checked in, and pulled out my computer while I am waiting. I am an hour early, so who knows whether they will call me early or not. Third Floor.
When I opened my computer, I was welcomed by the normal MD Anderson Internet connection. But this time a special announcement came with it. A press release dated today caught my attention. This is just one more reminder of what a wonderful facility I am blessed to be a part of.
MD Anderson just opened a research center in his name, devoted to the work of immunotherapy. If you want to read more about it, click here. Very incredible work they are doing!
Jim Allison is an interesting scientist. They really should make a movie about him. He’s the one who said our immune system can fight cancer, while all the others in the field laughed at his ideas. Well, we all know about immunotherapy now, and how much it has changed the health world. Amazing stuff. He was awarded the first Nobel Peace Prize for his immunotherapy treatment. Totally brilliant.
“Mr. West?”
“Who are you looking for?”
“Mr. West?”
“What’s the first name?” I said this with some degree of hopefulness.
She double-checked. It’s a guy. Rats. Looks like I’ll be waiting a bit longer.
At least they won’t have to poke me again. There’s always an upside.
Not everything I do medically is because of breast cancer, but it certainly has an impact.
I saw Dr. Knapps, a colorectal surgeon, for a consult today. Don’t worry if you don’t know what that is. The benefits specialist at my insurance company didn’t know what it is either. (I’m not sure he spoke English, to be honest.) But, it’s covered, so that’s all I wanted to know.
I was referred by my gastroenterologist, who did my colonoscopy.
He reviewed Dr. Maheshwari’s reports, looked at the path report and determined we are not in an emergency state. Whew! I knew that, but it’s good to hear him say it. The pathology report on the piece of the polyp already removed shows it is benign. But they have to take it all out to ensure there isn’t something else lurking underneath. Since it’s in the fold, I was referred to a surgeon.
The good news is, he can attempt to do it with another colonoscopy. (Yay! More prep 🙄.) Since he’s a surgeon, he can clip more aggressively to remove the whole polyp. If he accidentally clips my colon in the process, he can repair it. My gastroenterologist can’t do that, so they are more careful when dealing with the folds of the colon. He said I can do that in a couple of months or so. If that doesn’t take care of it, he may remove a section of my colon. I prefer the former option, so I’m praying that works.
In the meantime, I got a referral from my oncologist to see one of the MD Anderson colorectal surgeons for a second opinion. I’ll see her on the 24th, and then I can make my decision. If she says the same thing, I’ll most likely go back to Dr. Knapps. I liked him, and Tim liked him, so there’s that. Another benefit…He can do it locally rather than downtown Houston.
Medical insurance has been a life saver, but this week it was a bit of a stressor.
I received a call from MD Anderson, telling me Cigna was only going to approve one more treatment. That’s today’s treatment. After this, they said I would have to go outside the MD Anderson system to another facility.
I get these infusions every three weeks, so my doctor was concerned about doing everything in time for my next treatment. Also, how does that work? He can only write orders for this facility, which means I need another doctor elsewhere. How do they monitor everything? And how does MD Anderson keep up with everything if it’s not all done in house?
This could be a real pain. 🤨 The closest center they want to send me to is 45 minutes from my home.
I get it. I’m sure it’s all about saving money. MD Anderson is considered a hospital system, and any time you do something at the hospital it is quite a bit more expensive than when you go to an outpatient facility. However, I’ve been getting treatment here since 2012, with no hiccups like this. Routinely and more frequently since 2017. Why the sudden change?
I’m sure it probably has something to do with Covid. Isn’t everything?
I pleaded my case. I informed the Cigna case manager that I will be going on Medicare starting in July, so please don’t make me move for a few more infusions. My 29-month waiting period to get on Medicare will finally be over. They will not only let me on Medicare, but force it on me.
She asked if I would be using Cigna as a supplemental policy to Medicare. Uh, after this fiasco? My answer is a confident NO. I will seek another company for supplemental insurance.
If they’ll have me. 😳😳
After multiple calls with Cigna back and forth, discussions with the medical director, and reviewing my case, she called me back this morning. Since I only have five more treatments until July, they authorized the remaining treatments until my Medicare kicks in.
Hooray! 🥳🤩🥳 See, your prayers were answered before you even knew what to pray for!
So, today I’m on round eighty-something of Perjeta and Herceptin. There are five more rounds until I go on Medicare. At least, I believe I’ll be on Medicare at that point. If not, Cigna is holding fast to their decision to move me outside the system. I guess we’ll see when the time comes.
“…your Father knows exactly what you need even before you ask him!”
I prepped on Thursday (I already blogged about that fun process 🙄), and I had a colonoscopy yesterday 😳. The doctor also did an endoscopy (a scan of the stomach and esophagus.) More on the results in a minute. But first…
Public Service Announcement. If you are over 50, and you have never gotten a colonoscopy, NOW is the time to do it. The prep is awful. I can attest to that! It’s 24 hours of liquid diet including a total colon cleanse. I imagine this is probably why most people don’t get one. When will I have the time to do that? They ask. Or, they think it’s too expensive (insurance will cover it 👍.) And, you can’t drive yourself home. You can get a DUI for that. Trade off with someone you know. Drive them to get their colonoscopy.
Regardless of the inconvenience, a colonoscopy is the bestway to prevent colon cancer. You won’t feel any symptoms until you have cancer and it is so far along it may or may not be treatable. You don’t know what’s lurking in your system until it has been scoped. It is much better to prevent cancer than to deal with it. Believe me, I know about dealing with cancer!
If you have a family history of colon cancer, you should probably start getting a colonoscopy even before you turn 50. Maybe as early as 40, they are now recommending. My grandfather died from colon cancer, my mother had lots of polyps, and there are others in the family who have had bowel resections as well as other colon related issues. I make sure when it’s time, I get my body checked for this one.
I waited until I was 50. The doctor found a huge polyp during my first colonoscopy, and another one a year later. We don’t know how long the big one had been growing, but fortunately we caught it at the “pre-cancerous” stage. If I had waited, I could have added colon cancer to my litany of medical problems.
After a clear scan, he finally gave me the 5-year approval, which landed us to the present. The last thing I remember before the procedure was the nurse saying, “have a nice time at the beach,” and then I woke up.
Results. I would like to say I am totally free from polyps, or any other colon related issues. However, he found another large polyp in my colon 😫, as well as some spots in the esophagus that he will continue to watch. He took several biopsies, which will come back in a week or ten days. He was unable to remove the polyp as it is in a colon fold, so he referred me to a surgeon to remove that section of my colon. Yep, I’m having yet another body part removed soon. They can do it with a small incision, apparently.
I don’t know what all of this means as of yet, but I guess I’ll know more when I see the surgeon. He wants to wait until the biopsies come back so we know more on what we are dealing with. I’m not worried, but I do wish my family history was a bit less tarnished with cancer. It’s a horrible disease.
My husband is one of the lucky ones. He has clean scans, and gets to repeat in five or ten years. I pray you are also one of the lucky ones.
I get to repeat this again in another year. Oh the joy…🙄🙄
Bloodwork, Oncologist, MRI, Chemo AND prep for a colonoscopy, all on the same day. I know…I’m a little crazy for scheduling it this way. This fulfills that saying when it rains it…well you get the idea. It all started at 7:45 AM. Traffic was bad coming through The Woodlands. I’m tired thinking about it , but we’re nearly through the day at this writing. At least it’s not raining outside. The weather is beautiful; it feels like a spring day instead of winter. I’ve been going in and out to my car all day between medical appointments. The girls at the front just wave me in at each return.
Bloodwork. First, the bloodwork. Everything looks good. My glucose was a little higher than normal (165). Probably because I drank some OJ before bed, and then I had some apple juice right before I came in 🤷♀️. I often fast before coming in just so I can monitor where it really sits, but I knew I wouldn’t get to eat today so I drank the juice. We don’t worry about it typically, especially if I haven’t been fasting. I am careful, however; my family has a way of attracting diabetes.
Medical Oncologist. I do have a nagging pain on my right ribcage that has crept up in the past few weeks, so I mentioned it to my oncologist. This is how the tumor started on my left ribcage that lead to the Stage 4 diagnosis. A nagging pain that would come and go. I was between doctors at the time, as my oncologist left and I was seeing a physician assistant. He remembered that history, and he doesn’t like to leave stones unturned. They checked it out, and didn’t see anything, but he decided to have me go back for my bone scans a little earlier than usual just to be sure. We aren’t expecting anything nefarious to turn up.
In addition, he said there is some new research on Zometa. This is the infusion I get every three months to strengthen the bones. I was supposed to get it today, but he’s holding off. Researchers are debating how long is long enough, versus how long is too long, etc. I’ve been on it for about 5 years now, and they think 2-3 years is long enough. While it strengthens the bones, it makes them solid. Bones are not naturally solid. This is actually a weaker frame than the bones I call “suspension bridge” bones. He’s ordering a bone density to see where we stand before continuing the Zometa. I haven’t had one of those in a long time, so I don’t even remember what it’s like. I guess I’ll find out soon enough whether I get to snooze in that one.
MRI. After my oncologist and I chatted about our families and the joys of grandchildren, I went for my MRI. I did get a little nap during that one in spite of the noise and shaky table 😴😴. They took me in early, which was a blessing. A little trouble getting blood return on my port, but it didn’t stop the process. They are looking at my brain again. It’s a routine thing, and we hope it’s nothing, but they do a great job of keeping an eye on everything. I follow-up with my radiation oncologist next week for the results.
Lunch…
Ordinarily I would go to Panera Bread for lunch, and hang out in between scans or treatment. But it just so happens that today is the day before my five-year follow-up colonoscopy. 🙄 If you’ve ever had one, you know all about the prep. I’ve been on a clear liquid diet since I woke up. I had juice for breakfast, and two bowls of vegetable broth for lunch. I was thrilled to see they have added a machine with ice cream and popsicles to the café at MD Anderson. That was a welcome surprise! I can’t have the dairy, but the popsicle was a delight to bite down on–guilt and sugar free!
Chemo. I checked in two hours early, but they took me back nearly 30 minutes late. The sun will be setting on my way home, and I’ll catch the commuter traffic *Sigh*. Fortunately they didn’t have any trouble with blood return. At this writing, I’m on my second bag and almost done. One of my previous nurses told my current nurse that I am an author. She asked about my children’s book! She has a 6 year old daughter and 4 year old son, and she said she is going to order one. I hope she does. 🥰 If so, it was worth the wait. I told her I’m also working on sequels, to her delight.
Prep. While waiting for the chemo to infuse, I started prepping for my colonoscopy. This involves taking double doses of Miralax, followed by 12 horse pills an hour later, instead of all the gallons of that liquid we used to have to drink. So far, the effects have not been overwhelming. I’m hoping to get home before it reallyhits. Before bed we rinse, repeat.
Admittedly, I was a little frustrated when my internist’s office called and said they don’t have my cardiology release for the colonoscopy. MyChart comes in handy at this point. I can see everything in my medical record. The note said they faxed it back in September, but I had to send it to her again. If I went to all this trouble to prep and they don’t let me do it tomorrow…I just might shed some real tears. 😫😭 They have been behind communicating with me about all the prep. Yesterday I had to drive to Willis to get the pills, because no other Walgreens had them in stock. Sheeeeez.
Yet another day of life in our current dystopian world. 🙄🙄
Nearly a year has passed since the launch of my first children’s book. It takes a while to get to that point. And there’s that whole pandemic thing that got in the way as well. But we finally did it in March of 2021. Yay!
I don’t work on site, and my publisher is over 1,000 miles away. Everything we do is via email and phone calls. Sadly, during the week of my release, my editor quit. She just walked in and said goodbye, so I was told. No notices or anything. That says enough about her character, but she had also made a lot of promises on which she failed to follow through. Those promises were in my contract, fortunately.
They waited to do some of the marketing since the libraries were closed, schools were closed, and it didn’t make sense to market a book where no one would have access to it. So here we are, a year later. The publisher has decided the best way to fulfill their obligation, and to get my book out to market, is to do a re-release.
I am pleased to announce that process has begun. Today! February 1st.
Sooooo, they are doing it right this time. At least that’s what they tell me! The Kindle version will be on sale for $1.99 for two weeks, starting February 1st. Look for it there! If you would kindly purchase the Kindle version, or if you already purchased the book through Amazon, would you kindly take a moment to please write a review. I am shooting for at least ten reviews on Amazon. I would be EXTREMELY GRATEFUL! I hope they are all good reviews, but of course all feedback is welcome.
Finding a publisher, for those who are interested.
It’s a daunting task finding a publisher, to be honest. All the well-known publishers want celebrities (or their ghost writers) who guarantee millions of sales. They won’t accept a new author, and certainly not someone who is virtually “unknown,” as they are taking on a big risk since they pay up front for an author to write the book. Now that self-publishing is so much more popular, many authors choose to take that route rather than waiting for a traditional publisher to accept their manuscript.
When I published my first book, Mastering Test Anxiety, my co-author and I decided to publish with a professional counseling organization (ASCA, American School Counseling Association), as a way to give back to the professional community. They were looking for a book to add to their school counselor resource series. Although we are not school counselors, we are counseling professionals. We knew this book would greatly benefit children who were suffering from test anxiety as well as math anxiety. All royalties from that book went to ASCA.
My second book, The Breast Cancer Journey: Stories of Hope With Action Items for Survival, was self-published through Westbow Press. This book was a compilation of stories from various breast cancer survivors, to help other survivors on their journey. Westbow Press is a division of the better-known publisher, Thomas Nelson and Zondervan. Overall, they did a good job with that book, and many people have been helped because of it. My co-author and I paid up front for publishing and design costs. We then bought books and sold them, to recoup some of that cost.
I turned all the royalties over to MD Anderson, to further research on cancer. Once my books were all sold, and I nearly broke even, I didn’t continue to buy any more. People can still get them on Amazon. Westbow seemed more interested in selling books to the author, rather than doing the marketing for the book in other venues. To get marketing support—you got it—you have to pay for another package.
A true self-publishing company, Westbow asked for more money at every step of the process. We could accept or decline, but authors are very limited as to how much support you get from a purely self-publishing company. I already mentioned marketing. Here’s another example. We had two reviews of the cover design. If we didn’t like it the second time, we would have had to pay for another revision. Fortunately, we liked it the second time. But that’s a lot of risk when you don’t know the designers you are working with. Additionally, you have to pay for an editor. We decided to hire an outside editor rather than use one through Westbow. (I could write a whole blog about editors, which I’ll save for later.)
That brings me to my third book, One Day I Tried to Rhyme a Word With Onomatopoeia. This was my first children’s picture book, with full-color illustrations. It’s the first book in a series, or “I can say big words” series. Some of the words may or may not have six syllables, although that was the original intent. I didn’t want to go fully self-published with Westbow, as I felt the marketing and other services were lacking. I wanted a bit more support along with my up-front costs. I really wanted a traditional publisher to take it on, to get the marketing, editorial support, as well as illustrative supportive, but traditional publishers are not accepting unsolicited manuscripts, and unwilling to take the risk.
I did some searching and finally landed on a company called Atlantic Publishing, out of Ocala Florida. We visited their location while we were there, toured the warehouse of books, talked with their editors and support folks. They seemed legit. They seemed genuinely interested in selling my books, not just selling my books to me. Some might say they are vanity press, but they are known as a “hybrid” publisher. Their claim as a traditional publisher is to provide you with all the traditional supports, but they do not take on the risk. So, authors pay up front for the publishing process, then sales come later. I felt like I had a much better publishing experience with Atlantic than I did with Westbow. They provided me with an editor who stuck with me through the process. She found an illustrator (gave me several choices). We were able to make multiple revisions to the illustrations until I felt they were right. Yes, I had to pay for the illustrator, so that was an added expense, but it was worth it.
I recently learned that the owner of Atlantic Publishing passed away in mid-December. His brother is working on making the company strong again. I have hopes they will do so, but I seemed to fall through the cracks when my editor left and covid hit. So, I am waiting to see what will happen with the re-launch as to whether or not I will go with them again.
Now, on to the next project. I am working on two more children’s books at this writing. They are both sequels, per se, although one will be a chapter book from the older brother’s perspective. They are going camping in an Airstream Travel Trailer with their grandparents, and oh, it’s lots of fun! The other book is another rhyming six-syllable book like Onomatopoeia. It will look like the first one in terms of colors and size with the same characters. It will be a picture book as well.
Where I publish these two books is still a bit of a mystery. Atlantic is still working on righting their ship, so I have lost a little confidence in them at this point. (If they offered me a contract, I would certainly take it.) I’m debating on using KDP, which is Amazon’s publisher, because it won’t cost me anything to publish and then I can put more of my emphasis on marketing.
If you have any suggestions, or opinions on where to publish, I’d love to hear your comments below!
