In December 2016, almost 4 years to the day of my first diagnosis and later being deemed “cancer-free,” I was told I have Stage IV Metastatic Breast Cancer. (I was first diagnosed with Stage IIIb in December 2012). This isn’t my first rodeo, so this time around I have a different perspective. The first time I ignored recommendations for alternative medicines. This time I am targeting the cancer with lots of guns fully loaded. The first time I was scared speechless. This time, I just said, “okay,” and started treatment. The first time I had millions of questions, and my head was spinning constantly. This time, I still have questions but I don’t worry about the answers. There is a certain comfort in knowing what to expect. I knew the doctors, the routine, the chemo (although this time it would be a different kind), and I knew how to get to the cancer center. I knew that having a positive attitude would be the key. The first time, I believed that God would heal me and my faith was in God’s healing of this earthly body. This time, I believe God will heal me, but it may not be on this earth. He can miraculously heal me and remove the cancer from the body, but even if he doesn’t, I will trust him and remain faithful. I have learned that faith can be a source of strength, and comfort comes from knowing that God is in control…regardless of the outcome. True faith stands by the Lord even if we do not get our way. After all, the Lord Himself said “not my will, but Thine be done,” and then He died on the cross. Sometimes we have to put our own will aside, and let God do His thing. And it is always a beautiful thing!
It has been a year since my diagnosis, and much has happened in the past twelve months. Even though we are not at the beginning, I have decided to blog about my journey. Sometimes it may be very brief, like “I got my chemo today.” And other times it may be longer. I plan to educate as well as demonstrate faith in action. Somewhere along the way I will share the events of this first year, but more importantly, I am hopeful this blog will help others who are going through this journey. It is my gift to family and friends, patients, their caretakers; and as a counselor educator, it will also be for those who will counsel or educate the counselors who will be there for these patients. My goal is for this to be a lifelong blog, and I am hopeful it will be a very long life.
All things through Christ…