Today was a good day. I started off with Physical Therapy doing strength training after Breast Cancer. I have unlimited PT visits with my insurance, so I have been getting help on the lymphadema, scar tissue, and now I feel like I have my own Personal Trainer to help me get stronger. I felt a little queazy at one point of our workout, but my blood pressure was fine so we kept going. I was reminded of my 30s when I was going to a gym, working out, pressing my full body weight with my legs, and lifting 25 pound weights during body pump. Now in my fifties I could hear the Hefty commercial calling me, “wimpy, wimpy, wimpy,” as I looked at the 1 pound weights gripped in my hands…and hard work! We have a ways to go, but I’m determined to get stronger.
The main reason I’m writing is because I had a visit with my radiation oncologist this afternoon. I love her. She’s a great doctor, and very knowledgeable. She said the two very tiny spots the MRI found on my brain are only detectable on one set of slices, but not the other two (they have to triangulate to do any treatment). She also reassured that brain mets are very slow growing, unlike the aggressive tumors we’ve seen in other parts of my body. And since they are so tiny, she is not concerned. Due to the longevity of life in women with breast cancer (her words), they zap them as needed. It is likely I will have to go in and do this from time to time. The phrase “longevity of life” was music to my ears. I like thinking about living, and enjoying life.
Radiation to zap brain lesions (a/k/a brain mets, a/k/a/ brain metastasis) does not have any side effects. And for now, the tiny spots are not causing any symptoms either. Repeat the MRI in about 6 weeks, then see if we need to do anything else at that point.
She went over the possible treatment options for when/if the time arrives (I immediately turned down the Gamma Knife, which is downtown). Fortunately, I can be treated in The Woodlands (Yeah!). It only takes three trips to zap them, so it’s not nearly as big of an ordeal as when I got radiation on the surgical scar (I had 33 daily rounds, if you recall). There is also a possibility this is not even brain mets, and the spots may “disappear” by the time I get another scan. So, for that we are praying! I believe in miracles, and I’m thankful I have a doctor who does as well.
On another note, tomorrow I have an appointment with a dental oncologist–I didn’t know there was such a thing–as the bone scan showed some “inflammation” in the right TMJ. For this I do have to go downtown.
Otherwise, all my CT scans looked good. The liver, which you recall always had spots on every scan, is “unremarkable,” along with the spleen, pancreas, and my lungs also look great. I still have cancer in the bones, but it isn’t spreading. Everything is “stable.”
In December 2016, almost 4 years to the day of my first diagnosis and later being deemed “cancer-free,” I was told I have Stage IV Metastatic Breast Cancer. (I was first diagnosed with Stage IIIb in December 2012). This isn’t my first rodeo, so this time around I have a different perspective. The first time I ignored recommendations for alternative medicines. This time I am targeting the cancer with lots of guns fully loaded. The first time I was scared speechless. This time, I just said, “okay,” and started treatment. The first time I had millions of questions, and my head was spinning constantly. This time, I still have questions but I don’t worry about the answers. There is a certain comfort in knowing what to expect. I knew the doctors, the routine, the chemo (although this time it would be a different kind), and I knew how to get to the cancer center. I knew that having a positive attitude would be the key. The first time, I believed that God would heal me and my faith was in God’s healing of this earthly body. This time, I believe God will heal me, but it may not be on this earth. He can miraculously heal me and remove the cancer from the body, but even if he doesn’t, I will trust him and remain faithful. I have learned that faith can be a source of strength, and comfort comes from knowing that God is in control…regardless of the outcome. True faith stands by the Lord even if we do not get our way. After all, the Lord Himself said “not my will, but Thine be done,” and then He died on the cross. Sometimes we have to put our own will aside, and let God do His thing. And it is always a beautiful thing!