One of our Florida friends has cancer. Not the same kind as me, but his has also metastasized. Many of you know him. We were planning a trip to Florida in December and wanted to spend a few weeks, but when a friend goes home on palliative care, you do what you can to encourage them. NOW.
Tim had some free rental days, so we rented a nice car and drove to Florida. We looked at my oncology schedule, and found about a week when we could go between treatments. We got home late last night.
We might not have recognized him had we run into him on the street. The long beard that matched ZZ Top has been replaced by a clean shaven face, thanks to several rounds of chemo and radiation to the neck and head. I believe this is the first time we have ever seen him without facial hair. His appetite has wained. He is thinner, by about 100 pounds. His voice sounds different. He walks a little slower, but he is not bedridden.
In spite of his many physical changes, we can see he’s still the same person. He loves to play games, and he even sat at the table for several hours while the boys fought battles during Axis and Allies. (I went to dinner with the ladies.) After the game, we all reminisced. We went to church together. Played in a band together. Traveled to other countries and did rock concerts. He was our tour guide because of his impeccable memory regarding historical facts. He told a joke (I was the brunt). We all laughed. It was a great night to see our friends and hopefully provide them with a bit of a distraction from every day concerns, anticipatory grief, doctors’ visits, major life-changing decisions, and so forth.
We’ve been there. We are there. We know what it’s like to be told bad news. I am so fortunate the Lord lead me to MD Anderson and a team of specialists who found treatment to keep my body alive years longer than they expected. Not everyone’s body responds to treatment the way mine has. Not all cancers respond the same way. Sometimes treatment options run out. Many times they do. I’m praying our friends find doctors who are willing to try something else to keep going.
While I was talking to his wife, I was reminded of a song I recently heard by Dolly Parton and four other women. It’s a hope for the future where “pink is just another color.” The fact is, the researchers are closer to a cure than they ever have been. That’s what I’m praying for! If you’d like to watch the music video, here’s the link. Have some tissues handy.
We saw lots of friends on this trip, in spite of the brevity. You know who good friends are when they drop what they are doing to see you while you are in town. I wish we could have seen more! Maybe next time sick friends will be feeling better and we’ll have more time to get around town to see the rest.
I just did bloodwork, and now I’m waiting for my chemo appointment. They will infuse Zometa for my bones today, in addition to the normal Herceptin and Perjeta protocol. My oncologist got the blessing from my bone specialist. We try to plan our trips in the three weeks between visits. Tim and I often sit in a café, sip hot tea or Diet Pepsi, eat lunch together, work on projects (mostly separate ones), and bounce ideas off of each other for our next trip to wherever.
It was a quick trip all the way to Florida and back, and I’m so glad we went. We have decided not to question ourselves when the Holy Spirit leads us in a particular direction. Marker on the dry-erase wall calendar has been erased and replaced multiple times. We have learned to be flexible. Cancer does that to you. The process of going through it teaches you so much about living life to the fullest, being flexible, and spending time with the ones you live.
Now, go give your loved ones a hug. ❤️❤️
À la prochaine…hasta la próxima vez…until next time!
I get that question a LOT. “When will you be done with treatment?” The typical response inside my head is some quip that goes something like, “when I die,” or “I’m in it for life.” But I know the questioner is sincere and typically doesn’t understand all the ins and outs of my disease. So, I smile and explain why I will never be done with treatment. The protocol is every three weeks for terminal breast cancer.
I may have to change that mantra… 🤩🤩
I saw my oncologist today, and he gave me some potentially good news. He checked with the breast team just before my appointment and asked when this “poor patient” can stop treatment, if ever. After all, in December it will be six years since my diagnosis of metastatic breast cancer, and ten years since my original diagnosis of breast cancer. And I’ve been stable since January 2019.
I was encouraged to hear, HE was asking the question. I thought he assumed, like me, that it was for life.
However, at this time the response remains the same. “We don’t know.” The data doesn’t support stopping treatment as of yet. And we likely won’t have any new data for a very long time. After all, who wants to be part of that study? Stop treatment to see if you are cured, but risk a progression that could be even worse than the time before? Nah, I’ll keep plugging away until they have the data that says otherwise, or until it no longer works (if ever).
BUT, it was encouraging to know my oncologist thinks there could come a day when I will no longer need to come in for treatment. 👍👍❤️❤️❤️ THAT, my friends, is HOPE.
A few other things were discussed in our time together, like when I’m due for my scans and such. I also learned that he is now a full professor. That’s the highest rank at MD Anderson. He is such a humble man. I had to hear that from a nurse, as he would never tell me that himself.
After some laughs and chats with the tech, nurse, and physician assistant, I went back up to the third floor for treatment.
They obliged my request to get in earlier than my 2:45 appointment since I had finished my bloodwork and met with the doctor before 10:00. I haven’t been in a room with a bed for a very long time, so that was also a nice surprise.
As soon as my port was accessed, I logged in to my Active Living After Cancer group. This was the last week in a 12-week virtual class. We all “graduated” today, and I will forever remember these ladies. I also found a filter in Zoom I didn’t know existed.👩🎓🤪🤪
We plan to get together for some events and lunches to stay connected. Maybe even a monthly “reunion,” to encourage our activity. The leaders have been so encouraging. I have started a personal friendship with one of them, as she is finishing her doctoral degree and we seem to have a lot in common. Her energy is over the moon!
Also while in treatment I was blessed with a text from our daughter-in-law, containing the cutest video of my two youngest grandkids. She caught Mikayla saying she wants to see “NANANANANANA!” She was yelling it over and over. 😂😂😂 And the baby has his rattle socks I gave them, on his hands, rattling them like crazy. I cracked up watching it. ❤️❤️❤️
Treatment was done by 12:15 and I was ready for lunch. I love my nurses! Even with our chats she worked fast and efficiently. I was happy to eat and get home by 1:00. As I am typing this blog, we are on the road again, heading out for another Airstream Adventure!
À la prochaine…hasta la próxima vez…until next time!
A week on the lake is food for the soul. I could eat like this every day. We’ve taken in a lot on our walks around the park and down by the lake. And for those who may think Tim is all play and no work, here’s the view from our office. He’s in a meeting while I’m typing this. 🤪🤪 We have also been to Panera Bread and McDonald’s, where the WIFI is strong. Nothing is close, as we are way out in the boonies here, so we usually make a day or at least a half-day of it when we go into town.
I’m listening to Contemporary Christian music on Pandora. I just heard a new song by Sara Groves. Have you heard it?
I’m not sure if it’s the environment, or the medicine they have me on for this neuropathy study, but my feeling is coming back in my hands and legs. I still have some tingling in my fingers, but when we walk I don’t feel like my legs are as heavy. My balance is also much better. I have a total of 60 days on the medicine for the study. Once it’s gone, they said the neuropathy shouldn’t come back after that! Fingers crossed and prayers going up for that as well!
We will be here one more night, then we take the rig to DFW Airstream for some warranty work before we head home. And, our awning needs replacing (hence the umbrella), so they will also take care of it when we drop it off. Unfortunately the awning is not under warranty due to user error 🙄. That happened on our very first road trip to Florida. Lesson learned.
We’ll leave the Airstream at the dealership for two weeks as we will be back up this way for an Airstream Rally at the end of September, and the Balloon Fiesta the following week. That will save us pulling it down and back from Houston to Dallas. Bonus!
Sunset on Lake Tawakoni
À la prochaine…hasta la próxima vez…until next time!
After chemo we hooked up the Airstream and headed north to Lake Tawakoni (Tah-WAH-kuh-nee). It’s near Point Texas, east of Dallas, about 3.5 hours from our house. Looks like a nice, quiet place to sit for a week. Tim will be working from the trailer, or the nearest Panera Bread, and I will be sipping tea while doing whatever it is that I do. 🤪🤪
The hook-up went much smoother than we expected. We timed it, and from start to finish we were ready to leave the storage unit in less than 45 minutes. That included hosing down the rig and putting air in the tires, which we don’t always do. This storage facility has everything from a dump station to air and water.
One tank of gas made it all the way up, but we didn’t get as good of gas mileage as we had hoped. This truck does tow better than the Ram, though, which is why we traded in the first place.
Luckily, a spot was open right on the lake. It’s idyllic. Big trees will block the heat and separate us from other guests. We have a great view of the sunset. Tim backed into the camping spot like a pro. 🤩🤩 We had to use our levelers for the first time in a while.
Just after sunset.
Unhitching the trailer and setting up camp also went pretty smoothly, with only one tiny hiccup. We were getting a little tired by this point as it was already dinnertime, and we had a long day. He hurt his hand when he was taking off the first sway bar. 😳😳🙄 I think he was trying to hurry the process along as we were getting hungry, and he took it off out of order. His hand got caught between the propane tank cover and the tool, and of course this is the one time he wasn’t wearing his gloves. I had to push the tank cover over to get it unstuck. This resulted in some fairly good scrapes on his hand and on the tank cover, but fortunately nothing is broken. There were a few tense moments that nearly cost us our religion. 😳🤪
We had spaghetti for dinner, which is when we discovered one of the propane tanks is empty. (The stove wouldn’t light.) Hopefully the other tank will last the whole week, but we may need to buy more. Also, I forgot to turn on the fridge before we left 🙄, so the cold food will need to stay in the cooler until morning.
We finished just in time to see the sunset and go for a walk around the park. Regardless of the troubles and trials we face, we are still very much in love and enjoy the time we have together. Thirty-seven years of marriage have taught us a thing or two about learning how to communicate, manage conflict, say “I’m sorry,” and forgive each other. This is the value of putting the Lord first in our marriage.
It’s a great day to be alive!
À la prochaine…hasta la próxima vez…until next time!
Today is the first day of treatment since my Medicare kicked in. I wasn’t sure how it would work out, so I checked in early with high hopes to manage expectations. They assured me, it’s all taken care of. They assured me. there’s no charge for today’s visits. Whew! I’m still keeping my fingers crossed.
I also saw my oncologist this morning. I had a nice chat with the nurse about our recent motorcycle trip up north, and we talked about my mother-in-law’s passing. I also learned that my doctor recently had covid, so we aren’t the only ones. It’s going around, even amongst those who have been vaccinated. He apparently caught it at a conference. We laughed about how he holed up in a hotel to quarantine from his family. Since he couldn’t go out for food, his wife would bring him meals and leave it on the floor outside the door “like I had leprosy.” The quarantine is worse than the virus, in some cases. My caregivers have been with me for more than five years now. We have developed a good rapport, so it’s always pleasant when I go and see them.
My doc said he has to reload both of my infusions during this treatment, because it’s been more than six weeks since my last treatment (thanks Covid 🙄). Yesterday was exactly six weeks. If I had come in on Tuesday, we could have just reloaded the one. Herceptin has to be reloaded after four weeks, and Perjeta after six weeks. We try not to do that, but times like these it’s hard to avoid.
It’s going to be a long wait. I have 90 minutes of Herceptin and 60 minutes of Perjeta. Usually it is 30 and 30. I’m going to hit The Woodlands during rush hour. Oy vey…
My computer is full of juice, I have my Diet Coke by my side, and a warm blanket is on my legs. I’m ready to go!
I forgot to put on my port cream, but Warren is a good nurse. I didn’t feel a thing. He got good blood return and no problems with the port. Thumbs up…👍.
While sitting here, I received a text from a friend, whose friend was just diagnosed with breast cancer. They found it on her first mammogram. Fortunately they caught it early, and she can have a lumpectomy. It doesn’t matter the stage, it’s still hard to hear.
I am always empathic toward those who are newly diagnosed. The emotions are overwhelming. If ever you have heard a doctor say the “c” word, you know what I’m talking about. I pray for these women, as it’s a tough road. It’s a change in identity. We are part of a club we never wanted to join. Fortunately, there are lots of treatment options and we are living longer than we ever have in the past. God has blessed some amazing people with great knowledge and skills to treat and even cure the worse of cancers.
À la prochaine…hasta la próxima vez…until next time!
I’ve never seen a bear climb a pole before. Have you? Before you get worried that we were in danger, we were watching this unfold from the viewing deck at the North American Bear Center in Ely Minnesota, one of the intentional stops we made along our motorcycle path. Somewhere in the middle of Superior National Forest is a home to some rescued black bears, and some wild ones as well. We saw a squirrel do this just a few minutes earlier, but much faster 😂😂. It’s worth the 23 seconds to watch…
I learned a lot about black bears. For example, they don’t attack humans. They might chuff and stomp and throatily moan, but they do not growl (wolf sound effects are dubbed in for the movies). And they even have a white coat in some parts, unrelated to the polar bear and, no, they are not albinos. Lots of things to read in this place. The bear in the video is Holly. She is the matriarch of the bears at the Center.
Riding to the HOG rally, Duluth MI, our last day.
For the past decade we have looked forward to a big ride every summer. Some years we have gone on more than one trip. At the end of the ride we immediately began planning our next one. Last year we rode two bikes to Colorado, Lake Michigan, and Tennessee on three separate trips.
In December we sold the bikes.
We didn’t experience any remorse when we sold the bikes. We had ridden in all 48 states on two wheels. We’ve experienced rain, heat, hail, perfect days and not-so-perfect days, break-downs and bumps in the road that nearly fling you off your seat. We’ve seen a lot of sites. After our Tennessee trip, we didn’t immediately start planning another trip like we had in the past. 🤷♀️🤷♀️
After two days of riding home in the cold rain (insert claps of thunder sounds), perhaps we were burned out. Or maybe we just felt like we had accomplished our goal. Our bucket list was complete. In all reality, we aren’t really sure why, but we decided to do something different.
We plan to travel more using our Airstream. And, we will rent a Harley in far away places, where we can’t ride to (or don’t want to take the extra days to ride to). We will likely buy one someday in the near future.
Some people might wonder what this has to do with metastatic breast cancer. After all, that’s the purpose of my blog. It’s about livingwith metastatic breast cancer. We decided a long time ago we would not let life pass us by. We will continue to live life to the fullest as long as I have breath and energy to do so. We are taking John 10:10 literally, embracing the abundant life Jesus has given us.
The Ride. When they announced the national HOG touring rally was going around Lake Superior, we signed up as soon as registration opened. It’s a follow-up to the Lake Michigan tour we went on last year. It’s fun meeting up with other HOG enthusiasts as well as some executives who keep Harley-Davidson in check. We mapped out our route, and found the nearest dealership to rent a bike. We joined Eagle Rider to save on the rental cost.
Coop, meet our ride for the week! I promise she isn’t snubbing you, she’s just sad she can’t go along for the ride. 🤪😂
We rented the gunmetal gray Road Glide Limited pictured above from Harley-Davidson of Madison (Wisconsin). That’s a wonderful dealership. They stored our car for us as well. They are super nice and helpful people there. Alissa helped us with the rental, and another worker also helped connect Tim’s phone to bluetooth.
A sales guy tried real hard to sell Tim the CVO when we came back through. Tempting!! 😁
Because we were renting, we could not take the bike into Canada. That was a bummer, as it was part of the reason we chose this rally. I suppose we could have just tried it, but Eagle Rider wouldn’t cover any costs if there was an accident. Better not to risk it. We met the rally in Marquette Michigan, then went on an adventure of our own. They headed east to circle the lake counter-clockwise. We headed west and planned to meet them in Duluth.
The weather was beautiful from Madison to Marquette. The next day we rode west. Saw another Wisconsin sign, through Duluth, and on to International Falls through the national forest. Got rained on that day, but we did make it all the way to Duluth without getting wet.
Sad News. On the way to International Falls we got a call from Tim’s brother and sister. We were on a back road and had to find a place to pull over. His mom fell asleep with a cigarette in her mouth, while hooked up to her oxygen. She burned her face and tongue pretty badly. We stayed on course as they said Hospice was taking care of her. (She was already on home Hospice and was not given long to live.) We had planned to stop by on the way back through, and they thought she would be okay in a few days.
The next day we were on our way to Grand Portage Minnesota (by the Canadian border) when we got the call that his mom had passed away. I think this was just about the time we stopped at the Bear Center. Apparently, Hospice transported her to a Hospice House where they planned to care for her a few days. They gave her some morphine, and less than an hour later she was gone. It was July 27, 2022. She was 77 years old.
We have since learned the smoke inhalation (combined with her COPD and heart problems) lead to her death. They ruled it an accident. It’s a sad and traumatic way to die. She may have lived a few weeks longer had she not had the accident, but we are comforted by the fact that she was ready to go. She has been ready for a while now.
We were also happy we got to see her and spend some time with her on the way up. We played Yahtzee, had lunch together (she ate a whole meal with dessert), and chatted on the front porch. She talked about meeting Bill in heaven soon. Our last memories of her were positive, and we felt encouraged. She was a wonderful mother-in-law, and I will miss her.
Of course, this news put a bit of a damper on our motorcycle trip. We decided to cancel the last leg and head to his mom’s house from Duluth so Tim could meet with the family regarding arrangements. Canada is a long way up there! We had to return the motorcycle, so it wasn’t exactly a straight path. It would take us three days from the time we left Grand Portage.
We met with his siblings on Ruth Ann’s porch Sunday afternoon (yesterday), and went over the memorial and burial arrangements. It’s always interesting when family gets together 🙄.
Left to Right: Rick, Deidre, Deborah, Tim
Ruth Ann wanted to be cremated, which is probably a good thing given her condition at death. The coroner held her body to do their investigation, and finally released the death certificate this morning. On our way out of town, we met with the probate office, the funeral home, went by the cemetery, and stopped by the house to pick up some paperwork. We said our final good-byes (see you in a couple of weeks) to his siblings, then we headed home. We drove straight through.
Her memorial (celebration of life) will be in two weeks. Peachtree Village in Farmington Arkansas has graciously offered their facility, and they will provide food as well. Ruth Ann worked there for a while, and they loved her. Everyone did! Her memorial will be held on Sunday, August 14 2022 at 2:00 PM. After that we will move to Lincoln Cemetery for the internment of her ashes.
You never know how someone is going to die. I was told 6-9 months when I was diagnosed with metastatic breast cancer in 2016, and I’m still here. One of my breast friends was deemed cancer free and she died in an accident. Tim’s mom was told 6 months, then she died from an accident. Tim’s dad also died from unexpected, strange circumstances back in 2003. You never know. We just live this little mist called life to the fullest every day, trusting God for the outcome–whatever that may be.
What do you know about tomorrow? How can you be so sure about your life? It is nothing more than mist that appears for only a little while before it disappears.
James 4:14 (CEV)
Memories. It seems a bit odd to be posting a blog about fun and sadness all at the same time. But that’s the way life is sometimes. It’s filled with ups and downs. The line from Forrest Gump is so true…Life is like a box of chocolates. You never know what you’re going to get.
If you’re my FaceBook friend, you can see a bunch of photos from our motorcycle ride. It’s hard to pick just a few, as there are so many photos and videos to choose from. Here are some of my favorite moments from our trip.
Paris…Texas that is!
We’ve decided to start visiting all the Airstream Dealers. Most of them have no inventory right now.Finally got to go there. See Tim disappearing into the cornfields?!Loved laying on the soft, northern grass beneath the large shade trees.That was a beautiful day for a ride! Welcome to the Rally. Here’s your swag.No rain to Duluth, then it hit! 😫😭 We stayed in Ranier, which is a quaint port town with an award-winning hotel just outside of International Falls. Another beautiful day for a ride! We did get spit on a few times, but missed the deluge.Six miles from Canada! We took a walk and it was much longer than we anticipated!Windy! See the flags? Enjoy the ride!!We could have gotten a challenge coin here! Totally missed it. 😫This was a beautiful stop. Two lighthouses at one location!
À la prochaine…hasta la próxima vez…until next time!
This time it was Tim. He was away from me for several days, so we don’t think he caught it from me. I was no longer having symptoms.
We had our last day of worship at Parkgate Community Church on July 10th, and they gave us a nice reception to say thanks for the work we’ve done over the past nine and a half months. Tim was their Interim Pastor; I helped with worship and kiddos, as well as revising the bylaws. Their new pastor starts next week.
We packed up our Airstream on Monday July 11th and put her in storage. We’ve been living there half-weeks while Tim was Interim pastoring in Pasadena. Everything seemed to be going well until Tim started feeling a little under the weather later that night. He tested positive for Covid the following day. I tested negative.
No RV to quarantine to this time and I really didn’t want to go to a hotel. So we set up a barrier between us and steered clear of each other until he got better. He had congestion, cough, and fatigue for about a week. Then he had fever blisters that lasted another week. No kissing! 🤪😳😂😭
We were supposed to leave on our big trip Wednesday, so we had to make some last minute cancellations. Our original plan was to stop over and see his mom in Arkansas, then drive northeast to Villanova for our research residency, head west to Wisconsin and ride a rental bike in the Lake Superior Touring Rally, then head home. That all changed.
We postponed the visit with his mom and ended up doing our residency by Zoom (three days of listening to research projects). We weren’t the only ones who were recovering from Covid, or feared being in person, or for whatever reason didn’t want to make the trip. They opened up the option to everyone, which was super kind of them. About half the cohort was on Zoom.
Tim was feeling much better by the time his quarantine had ended, just in time for us to make the second half of the trip. The bike rental was non-refundable, so we really didn’t want to cancel that one if at all possible. We drove the Mini Cooper (“Coop”) to Arkansas where we visited with his mom, then on up to Madison Wisconsin where we picked up the bike and rode to Marquette Michigan for the start of the rally. The next day we rode to Minnesota where we stayed overnight in International Falls and then on to Grand Portage. Back to Duluth to catch up with the rally. We cut the trip short when we heard about Tim’s mom passing. More on that in the next blog.
Not everyone who has cancer is as fortunate as me. My treatment is keeping the breast cancer at bay. While I still have problems with neuropathy, brain fog, and fatigue (to name a few), living with metastatic breast cancer doesn’t mean I have to sit on the couch and watch television all day. Although it is tempting at times! It is tempting to use cancer as my excuse for doing nothing. Sometimes I do rest, purposefully.
I recently joined a class “Active Living After Cancer,” as a boost to my motivation to stay active. It was really hard right after surgery, and during Covid, but now I’m ready to get back into it. I am reminded of Paul’s words in his second letter to the Corinthians; these are “light and momentary trials.” We are still living life to the fullest.
On our motorcycle trip we looked for famous landmarks, took long walks in the evenings, and ate the local cuisine. In the daytime I used my muscles to stay on the bike. (Check out my next blog for more pictures from our motorcycle trip.) We fought the rain and cold, looked for healthy food options (always followed up by an ice cream of some sort 🤪), and enjoyed hot showers after every day’s ride.
Traveling or not, we often find ourselves sitting in a Panera Bread while working on ideas for future books, professional efforts, writing children’s books, or whatever job Tim has going at the time. I’d say we are pretty active! Nope..we won’t let this darn pandemic get the best of us.
À la prochaine…hasta la próxima vez…until next time!
Some of my faithful followers (or follower as it may be; there may only be one of you 🤪😂), are wondering about the whole surgery and recovery I just went through. I’ve been updating on Facebook, but here it is in one place for those of you who don’t see my posts or are curious on the chronology of events.
Tuesday, June 7. Surgery #1. SURGICAL LAPAROSCOPY WITH PARTIAL COLECTOMY, REMOVAL OF TERMINAL ILEUM, AND ILEOCOLOSTOMY. That’s a long way of saying I had surgery due to a large polyp in my colon. It was not cancerous, thank God! But I was glad we did it. I was in a lot of pain, even to the point of massive belly spasms if I was touched with the slightest feather.
Wednesday, June 8. Surgery #2 (Emergency Surgery). I had a sudden drop in hemoglobin and hypotension overnight. My blood pressure was 70/40 at one point. They started giving me bags of blood. I have O-negative blood, which primarily requires O-negative even though I’m a universal donor. In an emergency I can receive O-positive, which they did at least once due to a blood shortage. Dr. You wrote an exception that said, “Patient O Rh Neg transfused with O Rh Pos blood due to temporary unavailability of Rh compatible units.” People were asking if they could donate blood in my name, but she didn’t think that would matter. I could have sworn I saw an AB bag come through, but I must have dreamed that one. 😂🤪
They gave me about five bags total over night. It didn’t correct the problem, so I went in for a second, emergency surgery. Dr. You told Tim he might want to be here, so he came to the hospital and waited while I was in surgery. Nobody kept him informed as it was an emergency and they didn’t have him on a text string. Surgery was successful, and Dr. You said she was glad she had gone back in. They found a large hematoma with a hemorrhage, in the lining below my belly button. This is likely why I had all the belly pain.
She cauterized the bleed, made a bigger incision to remove the hematoma near the pelvis, and believed she had fixed the problem. I had two more bags after surgery for a total of seven. Plus a bag of plasma. Fortunately they were on top of it. Their quick response prevented what could have been a very serious or even fatal situation. This set my recovery time back a bit because of the back-to-back anesthesia, but we were back on course.
She’s not really sure why I had the hemorrhage. She said there are a lot of tiny blood vessels in that area. I have lots of scarring from my DIEP flap, so that could have contributed.
Thursday. June 9. They moved me to PACU, the step-down unit from ICU. The nurses are so attentive here. The room is small and uncomfortable for Tim as we can’t really talk very easily. I will be here for several days before going to a regular room. I have four incisions on my belly, with the largest being near my pelvis where they removed the hematoma. I’m so thankful there are no drain tubes! Just dissolvable stitches with steristrips.
Friday. June 10. I’m still on a liquid diet. Ice chips are my friend and I’ve been living on popsicles and jello. Honestly if I never see another jello again, I could live with that. I still have a catheter. I can barely move. Tim has come to visit me every day so far. It’s a long drive, and he has to navigate the whole parking system. It’s a pain, but he does it anyway. The nurses are so helpful, as well as the techs. They draw my blood regularly and bring me medicine for the pain. It’s tolerable, but I’m getting hungry for some real food.
Feeling a little down emotionally, due to some family related issues. There is a lot going on with our kids, Tim’s mom, his jobs, and of course … this. Being in the hospital makes it hard, because I can’t really do anything to help. I feel so helpless and Tim is taking on all the burdens. I’m looking forward to getting out.
A very cheerful Physical Therapist came to visit me late in the day. She was way too cheery for me today. I just want to eat 🙄. She had me doing some leg exercises and walked me all around the building. She’s trying to convince me to use a walker, which I did, reluctantly. I didn’t get tired as easily, but I really don’t like the walker. I feel like an old lady using it. It’s hard to listen to someone with a bubbly personality when you just want to crawl in bed and get under the covers. I told my doctor about that when he came by later and he chuckled.
Saturday, June 11. Day five in the hospital. We got up early, changed my gown, and moved me to the chair. Wow. We take so much for granted, like a simple move from the bed to the chair. It’s much harder than it looks. I had some trouble getting deep breaths due to the belly pain and it’s restricting. I’m doing my breathing exercises, and I ordered breakfast. Hot tea and a popsicle. Still on a clear liquid diet and waiting for the . My face is super puffy from all the weight gain. I’m hoping it comes off!
Tim came to the room and we worked on our research project for about an hour. There was a fire drill that lasted for at least ten or fifteen minutes, and had us wondering whether we would need to leave the building. Crazy…
Did my breathing treatment, meds, took another walk, then they finally moved me to a regular room. At least the window is bigger and I can see more than a parking garage. I see the blue sky and a rooftop of another MD Anderson building that has some type of garden up there. Intriguing. I’m walking better but still very tender in the belly. I’ll be watching church online tomorrow.
I am having difficulty breathing, so they did a chest x-ray. The tech came to my room and did it right there in my bed. It was done in 2 minutes. Amazing technology. Result: “The bilateral basilar atelectasis or pneumonia and small pleural effusions.” I saw the picture when he took it, and I thought it looked like half of my lung was missing. Basically I was full of fluid. My lungs were concerning, so I’m trying to do the breathing exercises more regularly. They want me to do ten per hour, but I sleep a lot so I know I’m not doing nearly enough. So. Tired. Fluid. Everywhere. I was gaining weight and it wasn’t coming off. So hard to breathe. So hard to stay positive. So hard to stay motivated to do the breathing exercises. They want me up and moving, so I’m walking around the nurse’s station 5-6 times per day. It takes a LOT of effort, but I know the adage, “no pain, no gain.”
Sunday, June 12. Wish I could go to church, but online will have to suffice. They removed my catheter which was a huge help. (They did that right about the time Tim started preaching Shh don’t tell him ). Still having trouble breathing, and my belly is swollen with so much fluid. So they did a CT scan of my abdomen. That’s the worse one I’ve ever experienced. Drinking the contrast nearly made me sick, and I had trouble laying flat and breathing. I could not hold my breath for the whole ten count, but they said it was okay. They did find lots of inflammation, including my gall bladder. At this point they are thinking it will settle down as the fluid begins to pass.
Tim came to visit me after church. He came bearing gifts and cards from the church family. A beautiful prayer blanket was knitted by Mrs. Gonzalez, who prays over every stitch as she makes them. It’s beautiful and meaningful as well. I am reminded I am covered in prayer whenever it is near me.
By the end of the day, I was passing liquid poop. Tim gave me a high five at five. I’ve never been so happy to poop. Then they let me take a shower and wash my hair. Yes, I did it myself with just a little help from hubby. He does deserve much credit. He is such a trooper. I love him and appreciate him so much. It’s not easy getting in and out of the buildings here. Amazing how much more human you feel after a shower.
I was up walking six times today including the CT adventure. I’m still on a clear liquid diet until tomorrow at least. I’m hoping I get some soft food like mashed potatoes or oatmeal sometime tomorrow. That would make my day. I haven’t been extremely hungry because of the the inflammation, but mashed potatoes sound really good right now.
Monday, June 13. Day 7 in the hospital. I did not feel well today, so I wasn’t feeling like posting. I was disappointed when the doctor said the poop was only one step. I still needed to pass gas. Still on a clear liquid diet for another day. Just a general overall yucky feeling. Smells, alcohol prep, even lovely perfumes were upsetting. I think I just need some real food in my belly. It’s been more than one week since I’ve had any real food.
The nurses change shifts every 12 hours, at 7:00 AM and PM. They always look at my incisions and share a report with the next nurse at the shift change. Most of the nurses are pretty good, attentive and helpful, but one nurse has a very thick dialect and I can’t understand most of what she says. I’m sure it is frustrating for her, but just as much for me. I was glad when her shift was up. The nurses and techs come in a variety of ages, ethnicities, and levels of experience.
Everyone who comes in wants to look at my belly. I’m thinking of charging admission. 😂
Tim wasn’t able to visit me today because of multiple meetings and work commitments, so I was not only feeling yucky physically, but a little emotionally drained as well. I was “tucked in” by my night nurse, who is older than some of the others. I have her had for a few days now. She cradled my head in her hands, kissed me on the forehead, and said, “I love you.” She will never know how much that meant to me, to hear those words just before going to bed. Nurses do not get enough credit for all they do.
Tuesday, June 14. Today is much better! I woke up before the sun when the lady from vascular access came to work on my port. She was interesting, with a spiked hairdo and fun conversation. We had a nice chat about Hall & Oates, amongst other bands from my era which she has seen. She knew who Charle DeChant was, also known as “Mr. Casual,” which was impressive to me. He plays saxophone for Hall & Oates, and I got to know him when he played in our band in Orlando from time to time. Love to hear him play!
Anyway, she was here because they are having trouble getting blood return from my port. It flushes fine, meaning it can receive fluids, but it must go both ways or there is probably a clot preventing the return. The needle was scheduled for removal tomorrow anyway, so she removed the needle from my port and inserted a new one. Still no blood return. TPA (medicine) was inserted to break down any potential blood clots or fibrous something or other. Wait three hours and try again.
Used the bathroom (this is becoming a regular occurrence now) then went for a walk. Three laps this time. I am very slow but I keep my head up and so far no falls.
My doctor came in around 5:00 AM and said he was bumping up my diet…FINALLY!! He had to staff it with the team to write the order, so I waited and waited. I could envision eggs, oatmeal, toast, and maybe even a banana. It took three hours for the order to go through, but I finally got to order my real food. Starting slow. Just a few bites of each. Just a flavor change. Even though the eggs were cold, it was a nice change of pace. If I do well on this diet, I might get to go home tomorrow.
So the Hall & Oates lady went home for the day, and another vascular access specialist came up and tried again. Still no blood return. Second dose of TPA was inserted, then we waited another three hours. No blood draws or medicine in the port during TPA. My port has had a beating this week. I think it is starting to rebel. In the meantime, I got flowers delivered to my room from the Parkgate Church family, and I talked to some friends. That cheered me up.
But the BEST news of the day came when I learned that our #6 Jedi was born at 8:14 AM! His birthday is June 14, 2022, exactly 13 months to the day after his big sister Mikayla. Jaxson weighs 5 lbs 11 oz, is 17 3/4in and head is 13in. She was 36 weeks, 4 days. He’s a tiny thing! Mommy and baby are doing well, and I can’t wait to see them both. This was taken right after birth, at the beginning of the “golden hour.”
Wednesday, June 15.
I managed to do well on a full diet for a day, so they discharged me today. Funny, I only had two meals really. Breakfast and then spaghetti for a late lunch. I only ate a few bites as I still feel very, very full.
We are staying at the RV for about a week, as I have some follow-up appointments downtown and we didn’t want to go too far away from the hospital for a few days. Just the drive to the RV made me sick to my stomach. I threw up, but once that was over, I started feeling much better.
Our RV looks like a hospital, with a wedge on my bed, breathing treatments on my nightstand, and multiple bottles of pain killers on the bathroom sink. I’m only taking them as needed. Fortunately my pain is under control.
Watermelon tastes really good. I’m trying to keep my fluids up, but my belly still feels really full. I have yet to pass gas, but I still have several bouts of diarrhea per day. Slowly feeling better, day by day. I slept 12 hours after I got home, without any pokes or prods in between.
Thursday, June 16. Today was a full day. I started a class called “Active Living After Cancer.” I thought this would be a good time to do it since I need to start getting active again after my surgery. It’s a virtual class on Zoom, and they are sending a package with all kinds of goodies in it. They wanted us to “walk” for 2 minutes in class, but when they turned on the video it was more like Zumba. 🤪😳 I couldn’t even do 2 minutes. I have a goal to work up to.
Our son and daughter-in-law surprised us with a quick visit to introduce us to our newest grand baby, Jaxson Timothy West. They have been waiting to make the announcement because they wanted Tim to hear firsthand that they named the baby after him. What an honor and a blessing!
He was released early from the hospital because there was a gas leak outside the building. Fortunately, he had already passed his hearing test and car seat test. Apparently the moms were all gathering in the lobby because they could smell propane. They started discharging them all, including little Jaxson and Bree.
I am still providing supervision for a couple of LMFTs who are working toward licensure, so I had two sessions this afternoon. They were very accommodating and understanding of my surgery and recovery. I was pretty tired after that, but it felt good to do something productive and helpful. What a full day!
The church has decided to bring us meals for a few days. That was such a blessing! We had kids meals from Olive Garden tonight. I was a little concerned about the spaghetti after yesterday’s fiasco, but I mostly ate the noodles and only a little sauce. I ate one shrimp. Only about three or four bites and I was finished. No problems keeping it down. I’m sure the other day was due to transporting home, and of course Olive Garden has much better food anyway. The kids meals were the perfect size. Tim ate the rest of mine and we had grapes left over for a snack.
Friday, June 17. I farted!
Friday, June 17. The picture captioned above says it all. 😂😂😂 I finally started passing gas, and while there was no “plop, plop, fizz, fizz,” it was such a relief! My system is taking a while to figure out the new structure, but it’s finally getting it. Our church friends brought us caprese chicken with rice, fruit salad, bagged salad, and homemade focaccia bread. It was nice to have company and chat for a few minutes. This was the first time I ate more than just a few bites. Nearly a whole meal!
Saturday, June 18. Getting stronger every day. But it’s slow going. I feel like I’m about 5% better each day, on a scale of 100%. I still haven’t left the RV, so my walking consists of walking from the living room to the bedroom and back (about 20 steps). We’ll get there! Tim turned on the golf, which is always good for a nice nap. 😂
We had a wonderful meal of comfort food brought to us for dinner, including potato soup and club crackers. Again, nice to hang out with friends for a few minutes as well. Those crackers lasted me a few days, and they came in handy whenever I started feeling a little hungry or queasy on a long drive. They also brought a small carrot cake. Oh my! Let me say this was absolutely delicious, although I still can’t handle a lot of sweets.
Sunday, June 19. Father’s Day! Typically we would have a day out, and enjoy some time together as a couple, maybe even with some kids. Today would not be a typical Father’s Day. I would stay in bed and watch church online while Tim was preaching. We did finally venture out of the RV together and went for a dinner at Panera Bread. We didn’t want to go anywhere that would take too much effort to walk in. I had mac and cheese, with plenty left over for dinner tomorrow. I thought I had bought him a card, but honestly I couldn’t find it anywhere. Oh well, there’s always next year. OR, we can celebrate the Australian Father’s Day in September. 🥰😁
First dinner out after surgery. Happy Father’s Day sweetheart!
Well, that’s the update from surgery to my first meal out. The following week I continued to get stronger. We finally got to move back to our home in Conroe on Wednesday. I weighed myself on my home scale, and I’m down about ten pounds from what I was prior to surgery. I can see it in my face. I’ll take it!
Tim left on Thursday for Arkansas to visit his mom who has been ill, and then on to Kansas City to a friend’s wedding. I couldn’t go, but I’m okay. I had several doctor’s appointments which various people drove me to until I could drive myself, in addition to treatment. I had my follow-up with my surgeon (Dr. You) on Friday June 24th, and she discharged me from surgery! Yay! I’m officially free, just continuing with recovery. No restrictions, except I can’t lift for another 4 weeks. She said by July 4th I should be feeling pretty normal.
I drove myself for the first time, to run some errands yesterday (Saturday), and the steristrips finally fell off later today as well. The incisions look really good. I think they should be fairly invisible within a few months.
That brings us to today, and the end of this very lengthy blog. Tim drove all the way home from Kansas City last night. He stopped a couple of times to sleep, so we will probably go to bed early. We watched church online and we are going to go see an Elvis movie this afternoon.
I know I’ve said it a bunch of times, but I am so thankful for all the prayers, cards, texts, calls, messages, and gifts from my friends and family. I have a great prayer support network, who prayed for me even when I didn’t have the strength to pray for myself. I am looking forward to continuing to grow stronger, to the point that at the end of July we have a bike trip planned. More on that later!
Whew! Another year is gone, and a New Year has come. 2021 seemed to fly by like a bullet train, especially after the snail’s pace with which we met 2020. We all thought it would be a better year. We had high hopes for 2021. Somehow we thought it would rush in like Superman and save the day.
Well, the pandemic stuck around and even brought some nasty variants. It did seem to have some rough patches, but as I looked back through the year I discovered 21 milestones/achievements/new experiences. Some of it is personal, and some of it we did as a team. Here is my 2021 year in review…
Read the whole Bible using a Bible Plan on YouVersion. At times I fell behind, but I managed to catch up and I DID IT!
Lost some weight–about eleven pounds this year.
Finished in the top tier on Duolingo, and completed a 602 day streak (learning French).
Walked 203 miles (that we counted).
Spent about 40+ nights in the Airstream: north Texas (Grapevine) at the AS workshop, Bridgeport, Lake Whitney, west Texas (Odessa), south Texas (Donna), and the Jetstream RV Resort at NASA, (south Houston).
Took three long trips on my motorcycle, and a fourth on the back of Tim’s. Earned my 100,000 mile patch. Rode over 10,000 miles through 23 states this year alone. We have accomplished our domestic motorcycle bucket list. Time to do some fly and rides!
Served as a CNS officer (editor).
Painted feature walls and upgraded our shower. Turned our guest room into a playroom for the grandchildren. Sold our bikes and reclaimed our garage.
Awarded a research fellowship and attended our first residency at Villanova University.
Bought a Mini Cooper, then traded and upsized to the Countryman.
Our fifth grand baby Mikayla was born! We also learned we are expecting #6! Spent a lot of precious time with the grandkids last year.
Tested positive for Covid-19, Omicron variant. Yucky stuff!
Sat in a DeLorean time machine!
Fostered and rescued a dog.
Tim started a new job, and ended his work with TXM.
Published my first children’s book. We published a second book for sermon notes as well.
Wrote a few songs.
Cooked some new meals.
Watched a Carolina Wren raise her babies.
Completed our first Escape Room.
Big SNOW in Conroe that lasted a whole week in February.
I suppose I could add one more…stayed alive. I have made it to the five year mark since my metastatic breast cancer diagnosis, a day many professionals didn’t think we would see. I’ve already blogged about that, but it is certainly a milestone!
Our theme word for 2022 is “simplify.” We have already begun looking at the calendar and making plans for the new year. I am hopeful this year will be better than the last two. However, looking back on all we have experienced in 2021, I can’t complain.
Forget what happened before…I’m making a new thing.
A few weeks ago I shared the sad story of Midnight, our daughter’s puppy who we fostered for five days. Due to their apartment restrictions and allergies in the family, they could no longer keep him. The shelter was closed when they moved, so we let them put him in our back yard until he could be taken to the shelter.
He was such a sweet puppy, only ten months old, and we fell in love with him. I became much more attached than I imagined I could. You can read more in my former blog about Midnight. We did have fun with him while we had him. He proved to be fast, smart, sweet, and he could jump! (Our fan remote which we left on the table has seen better days 🙄.)
A short video of our fun with Midnight.
It was time for our big bike trip to Lake Michigan, so we could no longer keep him in our yard. Also, we have too much stress to have a pet given my diagnosis and all our commitments. After many pleas, multiple connections, and no results, we took him to the Conroe animal shelter. I had heard horrible things about them, and I experienced it as well. However, we were left with no option but to leave him there and pray for this dear dog’s life.
I am so happy to reporthe has been rescued!A rescue organization called Forgotten Dogs of the Fifth Ward tagged him in less than a week to be saved. They found him a foster home not far from us. He got a virus in the shelter, so they gave him some medicine before he was to go home. They x-rayed a leg. They gave him shots. And, they neutered him. Many thanks to Kelle Mann and the Forgotten Dogs for saving his life.
The new owner is going to foster him until a forever home can be found, but I suspect they may turn into his forever home. They built him a new kennel in their air conditioned and heated garage where he will stay at night. They also have a great set-up outside for the dogs. Watch the video at the end for a great invention to keep dogs hydrated!
It took a few weeks for them to get him due to the virus, vet visits, and then they went on vacation. I waited until he was in his new home to blog about it as I was on pins and needles hoping it would go through. She kept updating me with information about him, and it was good to hear from her.
While they were on vacation, he stayed at the Kickapoo Ranch where he was trained. (Apparently he was running over and knocking down the older, little pugs at their home🤪, so he needed some attention.) The new owners also went for training, just before they brought him home on October 5th.
He has a new name!
Midnight is now “Blackberry.” I love that name, and so does Elizabeth. She was happy to see the updates and hear he is doing so well. It is not uncommon for new owners to give a pet a new name. It is unlike people who are very attached to their names. Dogs respond to whatever prompt they are given (and we given dogs many nicknames anyway).
The Bible talks about names. People were assigned a new name as a sign of hope, new beginnings, and new blessings. Abram was changed to Abraham, Sarai became Sarah, Jacob became Israel, and Simon was called Peter by Jesus. Blackberry is filled with hope for the future and blessings. I like that.
Here is a brief conglomeration of the pictures and movies sent to me by the new owner. It was so good to keep up and see he is happy and healthy. I love happy endings! ❤️❤️ I thought you might as well.
And now he is Blackberry! Getting trained and settled into his new home.
. My face is super puffy from all the weight gain. I’m hoping it comes off!
). Still having trouble breathing, and my belly is swollen with so much fluid. So they did a CT scan of my abdomen. That’s the worse one I’ve ever experienced. Drinking the contrast nearly made me sick, and I had trouble laying flat and breathing. I could not hold my breath for the whole ten count, but they said it was okay. They did find lots of inflammation, including my gall bladder. At this point they are thinking it will settle down as the fluid begins to pass. 
I’ve never been so happy to poop. 
Then they let me take a shower 
and wash my hair. Yes, I did it myself with just a little help from hubby. He does deserve much credit. He is such a trooper. I love him and appreciate him so much. It’s not easy getting in and out of the buildings here. Amazing how much more human you feel after a shower.
delivered to my room from the Parkgate Church family, and I talked to some friends. That cheered me up.
